Day 7: Deuter Futura 28
DISCLAIMER (READ THIS FIRST):
THIS IS NOT A LEGITIMATE ADVERTISEMENT, NOR SHOULD IT BE TAKEN AS SUCH. I AM NOT AFFILIATED WITH THE COMPANY IN ANY WAY. DO NOT MAKE A PURCHASE DECISION BASED ON THE INFORMATION YOU SEE ON THIS PAGE.
This letter really took on a mind of its own.
I started believing the audience was one demographic, but as I kept writing, it morphed into something else.
More on that in the following sections.
I wrote about the Deuter Futura 28. I bought an old version of this backpack after reading about it from a book written by my favorite blogger at the time.
Who is the Customer?
Initially, I wasn’t writing to a specific gender. The customer group was both males and females, generally millennial-age, with some disposable income and a huge passion for the outdoors.
As I began writing, the idea of “breaking up with your old backpack” and trading up to a newer, better one really became the focus. And, as that happened, I took on a snarkier tone.
It wasn’t so much a conscious choice as it was a natural reaction to that angle.
Customer Level of Awareness
This customer is solution-aware. They may not be specifically aware of the Deuter Futura 28, so I hesitate to call them product-aware, but thankfully, they are aware that backpacks exist.
Big Idea + Rationale
The big idea behind this one is that, even though your old backpack has served you well, you can “break up” with it, and trade up to something newer that suits your current needs better.
Big Promise + Rationale
This is a little murky, and if I had more time, I’d nail this down a little better. In general, the promise is that the Futura 28 is better than the current reader’s backpack, because it’s designed to be more comfortable.
I emphasized this by highlighting the features.
Overall, not bad. But the big promise could definitely be clearer.
When I started this project, I thought it would make me a master at writing sales letters. I’ve learned a few things about that assumption:
1. The letters are starting to flow more naturally.
Words seem to be coming out a bit easier, and I’m hitting more of a rhythm where I can recognize that it’s time for the CTA at the end.
2. The biggest change hasn’t been in the quality of the letters, but in the way my mind works.
Witty phrases are starting to come more easily. Both in my writing and in my daily life, I’ve found myself a bit more able to throw out quick witticisms here and there, and while that’s definitely good for copywriting, more than anything, it’s just FUN.
In regard to this letter, specifically, I think it shows promise, and I like the angle. BUT, it definitely needs some more massaging. I think the snarky tone, while fun, walks a fine line.
My main fear would be that it talks at the reader rather than to the reader. If I had more time with this one, I’d work to walk that line a little better.